Twisted Thinking 4

9. LABELLING

Labelling is an extreme form of all-or-nothing thinking. Instead of saying "I made a mistake," you attach a negative label to yourself: "I'm a loser." You might also label yourself "a fool" or "a failure" or "a jerk."

You may also label others. When someone does something that rubs you the wrong way, you may tell yourself: "He's a nitwit."

10. PERSONALIZATION

You hold yourself personally responsible for an event that isn't entirely under your control. When a woman's husband beat her, she told herself, "If only I were better off, he wouldn't beat me."

Some people do the opposite. They blame other people and they overlook the ways that they might be contributing to the problem: "My marriage is so lousy because my spouse is totally unreasonable."